So I've realized I'm one of THOSE parents. You know the kind where the kid is eternally embarrassed because the kid's mom is running around the ball park with six giant buttons of the kid's face on her wannabe letterman's jacket with the kid's name and number on it, face paint stickers to match the cheerleaders, screaming at the top of her lungs with pride, joy and pure fanatical, unsportsmanlike slurs at the umpires? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's going to be me.
My daughter is just a wee 5 months old and I already know that's what kind of mom I am.
This week has been the start of the Little League World Series. And I'm totally sucked in like it's my own American Idol. I find myself walking into the house and seeing another game is on and getting really into. Like REALLY into it. Every time there's a good play, I'm cheering on the team. Any time there's a big play, a big hit, or a crazy call at the plate, I'm cheering. When it's the bottom of the 6th (last inning in LL), and the team up to bat has 2 outs and they need a run or two to keep going, I get teary eyed thinking of the pressure that poor little kid is under to do his best. And then I start crying thinking, my god, I'm going to have a kid in just a few years that will be playing in important games like this. And I'm going to be a crazy wreck!
I'm crying over a kid that's not mine, I've never met, and I don't even know what his name is. I just know I want him to get a hit so he can keep playing the game he loves! And again, THIS ISN'T MY KID!
So what kind of basket case am I going to be when Elly is up to bat and the game is up to her? I'm going to need to be escorted from the field, that's what I'm going to be. Because if I see a ball coming across the plate that I don't think is a strike and the ump calls it as such, I'm going to probably hop the dugout and rip his eyes out. Doesn't he know that he's doing that to MY baby?!?!
And if the ump even thinks of calling her out when she's clearly just slid into home and was safe, I might get arrested for kicking the crap out of him. Because I'm already that involved in the game.
These kids playing in the LLWS are amazing! They have so much heart and passion. They are still just playing for the love of the game. It's like watching the Sandlot over and over and I love it!
I'm a passionate sports fan. When we win my spirits are sky high. When we lose I'm in the dumps. I'm invested and even if I'm not playing, my heart is still in it because I'm in the stands or on my couch (usually jumping on it) cheering. Because that's what fans do!
So in a few years, if you're at the ball park, football field, or ice rink and you see a crazy ass Betty running around with face paint, foam finger and cow bell, just know that's me and if you get in the way of my kid, I'll kick your ass.
About Me
- Betty Bakedgood
- I'm a working single mom who loves to write in my spare time... so bare with me when there's a lull in the blogging. It means I'm out enjoying my daughter, Elly's, crazy antics!
Friday, August 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Being an Adult Rocks!
Yesterday afternoon I discovered that being an adult rocks. While driving home from Best Buy, I got a text message from my BFF, Abby. Turns out she's one car behind me on her way home too! YAY!
So we discuss the fact we're both in the High Occupancy Vehicle lane with only one passenger in each car and we cook up what our excuse will be when we get pulled over for breaking the law. Let's just say her excuse was way better than mine and I'll be using that one now as well.
Then she confesses this random gem to me: "So I just ate a quarter pound of deli meat straight out of the bag."
Mind you we're driving down the road while she declares this fact. My response? Convulsing in laughter because I can honestly picture her reaching back into her grocery bag, pulling out the deli meat package, ripping it open like a ravenous beast and tearing into the tasty goodness that is smoked peppercorn turkey.
Our conversation goes a little something like this:
A: "I have so little will power!"
B: "Don't worry, I'm not judging you! I'm actually a little jealous I don't have deli meat to eat right now."
A: "I could pull up alongside of you and try and toss it in your window."
B: "Could you actually imagine us trying to pull that stunt? It would be hilarious! It's cool if it gets on the windshield, I'll still eat it and I think I could still get to it depending on where it lands."
A: "MMMM, windshield meat."
B: "And don't worry about the bugs, it's just extra protein!"
A: "I'm not going to be able to do this when I have kids. I'll have to set an example!"
And that's when I remembered something my mom told me the night before.
My mom got a new iPhone and we were discussing games for her to download on it. She was interested in getting Angry Birds and I told her she needed to be careful, because once she starts playing it, people will think she has turrets and it's incredibly addicting. I asked her if she remembers when Tetris came out and how addicting it was. And how you just had to keep playing because you know you can get to the next level. That's what Angry Birds was like, but with more swearing.
My memory of Tetris and when Nintendo first came out was that she didn't want my sister and me playing too much. Video games were junk and we didn't need to rot our brains on them.
And then she spilled this dirty little secret. She used to rush home on her lunch breaks when we were in school so she could play the Nintendo! She would take her hour lunch, spend a half hour driving back and forth, and the other half hour playing Mario Brothers. Then when she got back to work, she'd compare notes with her co-workers so they could get to the next level.
My mom is a closet GAMER! Are you kidding me? That's why she didn't want us playing, she was too busy secretly playing.
And then it dawned on me. Abby and I weren't going to have to stop our dirty little secret of eating deli meat straight out of the bag on the car ride home from the grocery store once our kids are in the car. We just had to do it when they weren't looking!
So not only can you eat cookies for breakfast and ice cream for dinner, but you can also be a huge hypocrite to your kids and they don't even need to know about it until 20 years later! That's why being an adult totally rocks!!!!
So we discuss the fact we're both in the High Occupancy Vehicle lane with only one passenger in each car and we cook up what our excuse will be when we get pulled over for breaking the law. Let's just say her excuse was way better than mine and I'll be using that one now as well.
Then she confesses this random gem to me: "So I just ate a quarter pound of deli meat straight out of the bag."
Mind you we're driving down the road while she declares this fact. My response? Convulsing in laughter because I can honestly picture her reaching back into her grocery bag, pulling out the deli meat package, ripping it open like a ravenous beast and tearing into the tasty goodness that is smoked peppercorn turkey.
Our conversation goes a little something like this:
A: "I have so little will power!"
B: "Don't worry, I'm not judging you! I'm actually a little jealous I don't have deli meat to eat right now."
A: "I could pull up alongside of you and try and toss it in your window."
B: "Could you actually imagine us trying to pull that stunt? It would be hilarious! It's cool if it gets on the windshield, I'll still eat it and I think I could still get to it depending on where it lands."
A: "MMMM, windshield meat."
B: "And don't worry about the bugs, it's just extra protein!"
A: "I'm not going to be able to do this when I have kids. I'll have to set an example!"
And that's when I remembered something my mom told me the night before.
My mom got a new iPhone and we were discussing games for her to download on it. She was interested in getting Angry Birds and I told her she needed to be careful, because once she starts playing it, people will think she has turrets and it's incredibly addicting. I asked her if she remembers when Tetris came out and how addicting it was. And how you just had to keep playing because you know you can get to the next level. That's what Angry Birds was like, but with more swearing.
My memory of Tetris and when Nintendo first came out was that she didn't want my sister and me playing too much. Video games were junk and we didn't need to rot our brains on them.
And then she spilled this dirty little secret. She used to rush home on her lunch breaks when we were in school so she could play the Nintendo! She would take her hour lunch, spend a half hour driving back and forth, and the other half hour playing Mario Brothers. Then when she got back to work, she'd compare notes with her co-workers so they could get to the next level.
My mom is a closet GAMER! Are you kidding me? That's why she didn't want us playing, she was too busy secretly playing.
And then it dawned on me. Abby and I weren't going to have to stop our dirty little secret of eating deli meat straight out of the bag on the car ride home from the grocery store once our kids are in the car. We just had to do it when they weren't looking!
So not only can you eat cookies for breakfast and ice cream for dinner, but you can also be a huge hypocrite to your kids and they don't even need to know about it until 20 years later! That's why being an adult totally rocks!!!!
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Nights of Torture
I was afraid to write this blog a few days ago. I didn't want to jinx myself. In fact, I'm actually still a little nervous to type what I'm about to type: my daughter finally sleeps through the night!
Now that I've put it out there, I'm sure that she'll get wind of it, figure out that she's still in control if she throws a fit, and we'll probably be back at square one tonight. But until then, I'll just say this, Elly sleeping through the night + me sleeping through the night = SLEEP IS FUCKING GLORIOUS!!!!
I forgot how much I loved it! I seriously forgot all about the amazing nights of sleep I used to get more than a year ago when I could just zonk out as soon as my head hit the pillow. What's really terrible is that I took sleep for granted. (I'll never make that mistake again!)
Once I got pregnant that all changed. I was as fat as a cow (news flash, fat cows don't sleep, they're too fat) and little did I realize then, that I would become an actual dairy cow (dairy cows don't sleep either because they're up all night making milk)!
Last week I had a 3 day weekend. So what better time to celebrate than to tell my daughter it's bed time so suck it up, be a big girl and CRY IT OUT! Mom needs some sleep!
The first night was pretty much pure torture for her, me and my mom. She woke up and screamed bloody murder. Scream and scream and scream. Here's your binky now shut the hell up kid! (I didn't actually say that to her, I think it was more like ssshhhh! and aldfkjosaduflkjdf adlkfjosdif because I was about 3/4ths asleep.) She had a rough Friday and had a few naps, which is unusual for my kid. I, however, did not get a nap because mommies don't get naps. (In case you were wondering, that's also not in the baby books.)
But a funny thing happened on night two. She only woke up twice and they weren't very long meltdowns. Just a couple shhh's and popping the binky back in and TA DA! We've got sleep!
And even better yet, by night three she slept all the way until 5:30 AM! Holy crap! That's like a miracle! She's finally gotten the hang of it and I get my sleep back.
Who knew that a few nights of torture could feel this good?! Now let's just hope she doesn't decide to punish me and stay up all night again.
Now that I've put it out there, I'm sure that she'll get wind of it, figure out that she's still in control if she throws a fit, and we'll probably be back at square one tonight. But until then, I'll just say this, Elly sleeping through the night + me sleeping through the night = SLEEP IS FUCKING GLORIOUS!!!!
I forgot how much I loved it! I seriously forgot all about the amazing nights of sleep I used to get more than a year ago when I could just zonk out as soon as my head hit the pillow. What's really terrible is that I took sleep for granted. (I'll never make that mistake again!)
Once I got pregnant that all changed. I was as fat as a cow (news flash, fat cows don't sleep, they're too fat) and little did I realize then, that I would become an actual dairy cow (dairy cows don't sleep either because they're up all night making milk)!
Last week I had a 3 day weekend. So what better time to celebrate than to tell my daughter it's bed time so suck it up, be a big girl and CRY IT OUT! Mom needs some sleep!
The first night was pretty much pure torture for her, me and my mom. She woke up and screamed bloody murder. Scream and scream and scream. Here's your binky now shut the hell up kid! (I didn't actually say that to her, I think it was more like ssshhhh! and aldfkjosaduflkjdf adlkfjosdif because I was about 3/4ths asleep.) She had a rough Friday and had a few naps, which is unusual for my kid. I, however, did not get a nap because mommies don't get naps. (In case you were wondering, that's also not in the baby books.)
But a funny thing happened on night two. She only woke up twice and they weren't very long meltdowns. Just a couple shhh's and popping the binky back in and TA DA! We've got sleep!
And even better yet, by night three she slept all the way until 5:30 AM! Holy crap! That's like a miracle! She's finally gotten the hang of it and I get my sleep back.
Who knew that a few nights of torture could feel this good?! Now let's just hope she doesn't decide to punish me and stay up all night again.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Losing my hair... and my marbles
Before I got pregnant I had read that pregnant women have beautiful hair. And for me, that was true. My hair became so shiny and lustrous! It was beautiful and felt amazing!!! I was already "blessed" with thick hair, but once I got pregnant, it was like I had a fortress of hair it was so thick! And I couldn't stop petting my own head. I must have looked like a freak, or P.Diddy stroking the furry wall. Either way, my hair was gorgeous!
What the books forget to mention is that after you have the baby, all your hair falls out. And when I say all your hair, I mean ALL YOUR HAIR! Every day I find myself checking to make sure I don't have a bald spot where I just brushed. My shower looks like Big Foot just got attacked by Edward Scissor Hands. It's bad. I've gotten to the point where I just collect all the hair in alittle giant ball, rather than let it go down the drain because otherwise we're going to have a huge pluming problem!
And then when I get out and actually brush my hair... forget it. It's everywhere. I feel like the sad, pathetic duckling that's molting and thinks it's the ugliest thing on the planet. The problem is, I'm pretty sure I'm not about to emerge as a swan. My swan hair was during pregnancy. This whole ugly duckling thing is going in reverse for me and it sucks.
On top of the "Great Shed of 2011" I'm also starting to grow some of the hair back. So now I have all these crazy, wispy hairs that are half curly, half straight sticking out of my head everywhere. They almost look like wayward pubes. Sick! I have pubes on my head!!!!
To top it all off, I'm also losing my mind. I also read during my pregnancy that women usually get "pregnancy brain" and can't remember things. And I was told that this usually lasts for awhile after the baby is born, or can possibly be permanent. Terrific! So not only am I losing my beautiful hair and growing pubes instead, I also can't remember why I'm so upset about pubes. Or remember where I just put the check book that's sitting in front of me, or remember that I have an appointment at some point sometime this week somewhere for some ailment that's been bothering me but that I can't remember what it is for the life of me today. And the calendar I was doing so well at tracking everything in? Yeah, I have no idea where it's at so I'm now completely lost.
If this is what it's like to get old, just shoot me now. If it gets worse, I don't know what I'll do. Actually, I probably won't do anything because I won't even remember that I'm upset that I can't remember. What really worries me is what happens if I have another baby? I honestly don't think my brain can take another blow like that. I know my pube-hair cant! Could you imagine molting pube-hair? Good God! What grows back to replace that crap??? I can't even begin to imagine!
If I would have known I was going to be losing this much hair and my marbles, I probably would have invested in wigs and post-it notes. Ahhh, the things my mother, and pretty much every other woman on the planet that has a kid, forgot to tell me about. Elly just better behave during her teen years, or I might just forget to tell her these important facts! Enjoy your swan hair while you've got it because it'll turn into pube-hair, and you'd better get a good calendar/ post-it system in place and attach it to your body if you ever plan on remembering anything after you have a baby kido!!!!
Until later
~Betty
What the books forget to mention is that after you have the baby, all your hair falls out. And when I say all your hair, I mean ALL YOUR HAIR! Every day I find myself checking to make sure I don't have a bald spot where I just brushed. My shower looks like Big Foot just got attacked by Edward Scissor Hands. It's bad. I've gotten to the point where I just collect all the hair in a
And then when I get out and actually brush my hair... forget it. It's everywhere. I feel like the sad, pathetic duckling that's molting and thinks it's the ugliest thing on the planet. The problem is, I'm pretty sure I'm not about to emerge as a swan. My swan hair was during pregnancy. This whole ugly duckling thing is going in reverse for me and it sucks.
On top of the "Great Shed of 2011" I'm also starting to grow some of the hair back. So now I have all these crazy, wispy hairs that are half curly, half straight sticking out of my head everywhere. They almost look like wayward pubes. Sick! I have pubes on my head!!!!
To top it all off, I'm also losing my mind. I also read during my pregnancy that women usually get "pregnancy brain" and can't remember things. And I was told that this usually lasts for awhile after the baby is born, or can possibly be permanent. Terrific! So not only am I losing my beautiful hair and growing pubes instead, I also can't remember why I'm so upset about pubes. Or remember where I just put the check book that's sitting in front of me, or remember that I have an appointment at some point sometime this week somewhere for some ailment that's been bothering me but that I can't remember what it is for the life of me today. And the calendar I was doing so well at tracking everything in? Yeah, I have no idea where it's at so I'm now completely lost.
If this is what it's like to get old, just shoot me now. If it gets worse, I don't know what I'll do. Actually, I probably won't do anything because I won't even remember that I'm upset that I can't remember. What really worries me is what happens if I have another baby? I honestly don't think my brain can take another blow like that. I know my pube-hair cant! Could you imagine molting pube-hair? Good God! What grows back to replace that crap??? I can't even begin to imagine!
If I would have known I was going to be losing this much hair and my marbles, I probably would have invested in wigs and post-it notes. Ahhh, the things my mother, and pretty much every other woman on the planet that has a kid, forgot to tell me about. Elly just better behave during her teen years, or I might just forget to tell her these important facts! Enjoy your swan hair while you've got it because it'll turn into pube-hair, and you'd better get a good calendar/ post-it system in place and attach it to your body if you ever plan on remembering anything after you have a baby kido!!!!
Until later
~Betty
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
It's All About Perspective
Yesterday was not a good day. A friend, and coworker, was killed in a car accident on her way to work. She left behind a husband, daughter and countless family and friends.
As the day unfolded and more details of the senseless tragedy were discovered, I couldn't help but realize how sad, yet calm I was.
I have lost a few family members but it's always been because of age and hasn't been sudden or unexpected. I've been incredibly fortunate to not know anyone personally stricken by tragedy... Until yesterday.
Because of this I don't really know how to deal with grief. But as it turns I was very calm throughout the day. I was able to take calls and get details and pass those details on to other coworkers. I was able to keep working, though I was distracted.
It wasn't until I drove home for the evening that I broke down. That's when it really hit me. Her husband and daughter would be getting home and she wasn't going to be meeting them there. They weren't going to be eating dinner as a family. Their lives are forever changed.
And then my mind began to race. What about my Elly? What if anything were to happen to me or my husband? How would she be? And I just kept thinking of my friend's daughter, who is so young and had so much more to learn from her mom. And I just couldn't stop thinking about my friend and praying for her family.
What I've realized is that none of my normal day to day worries really even matter. What matters is spending as much quality time as possible with the people you love the most. Because you truly never know what can happen and when your world could be changed forever.
It's been a real eye-opener and has put a lot of my life into perspective.
Until later
~Betty
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
As the day unfolded and more details of the senseless tragedy were discovered, I couldn't help but realize how sad, yet calm I was.
I have lost a few family members but it's always been because of age and hasn't been sudden or unexpected. I've been incredibly fortunate to not know anyone personally stricken by tragedy... Until yesterday.
Because of this I don't really know how to deal with grief. But as it turns I was very calm throughout the day. I was able to take calls and get details and pass those details on to other coworkers. I was able to keep working, though I was distracted.
It wasn't until I drove home for the evening that I broke down. That's when it really hit me. Her husband and daughter would be getting home and she wasn't going to be meeting them there. They weren't going to be eating dinner as a family. Their lives are forever changed.
And then my mind began to race. What about my Elly? What if anything were to happen to me or my husband? How would she be? And I just kept thinking of my friend's daughter, who is so young and had so much more to learn from her mom. And I just couldn't stop thinking about my friend and praying for her family.
What I've realized is that none of my normal day to day worries really even matter. What matters is spending as much quality time as possible with the people you love the most. Because you truly never know what can happen and when your world could be changed forever.
It's been a real eye-opener and has put a lot of my life into perspective.
Until later
~Betty
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Pink or Blue? Does it even matter?
I work with a guy who's girlfriend is pregnant. They decided to find out what the sex of the baby was and found out this week. Break out the pink ribbon because it's a girl! As exciting as that is, he's not excited. He's moping around, sad that he's not having a boy. Because he really, really wanted a boy. Boo hoo.
Well guess what asshole, you get what you get! And as my friend Abby said, ‘if you wanted to choose the sex, you should have gotten a puppy instead.’
During my pregnancy I dreamt I was having a boy. I daydreamed I was having a boy. And I wanted a boy. I thought how fun it would be to watch my husband teach him how to do all sorts of awesome boy things and how rewarding it would be to teach him to be a gentleman to girls. Plus, tutus aren't really my thing.
But I also thought about how awesome it would be to have a little girl. I could teach her how to be rough and tough, yet still look good in a dress. And watch my husband get wrapped around her finger while he builds her a dollhouse and teaches her how to drive.
In the end, I chose not to find out the sex during my pregnancy. Because it didn't matter what came out, I was going to love it no matter what. Plus there isn't exactly a very good return policy on it if you don't get exactly what you wanted. And I can't even tell you how many times I heard people complain about how I wasn't finding out.
"What do you mean you're not finding out? Aren't you curious?" Well of course I am stupid, but that's what makes it fun! Because there's a really good chance you're getting one or the other! So what does it matter?
"Well how will I know what to buy you for a shower gift if I don't know what it is?" Hey dumbass, I'm registered for a reason. Pick anything off the list and send it to me! That's what I want and need, so that's what you should get me.
"But you'll have all this green and yellow stuff!" Yeah, so? So did I when I was a baby because "back then" you COULDN'T find out. And I turned out just fine! In fact, I'm wearing a pink shirt today, so I obviously figured out what color was assigned to me because I'm a girl. Plus, there's a good chance I'm going to have more than one kid. And if I have a boy next, I won't have to go out and buy all new stuff right away, because it's already gender neutrual!
"But I want to know!" Well guess what? You're not getting fat, puking your brains out, or getting stretch marks right now. So you don't get to make the decision, I do! So there!!!!
Ultimately, I'm thrilled I never knew. When she finally came out and the doctor said 'IT'S A GIRL!' I didn't care, I was just so happy she was here and healthy. She's now 5 months old and I couldn't imagine not having her in my life just the way she is. She's perfect.
Until later
~Betty
Well guess what asshole, you get what you get! And as my friend Abby said, ‘if you wanted to choose the sex, you should have gotten a puppy instead.’
During my pregnancy I dreamt I was having a boy. I daydreamed I was having a boy. And I wanted a boy. I thought how fun it would be to watch my husband teach him how to do all sorts of awesome boy things and how rewarding it would be to teach him to be a gentleman to girls. Plus, tutus aren't really my thing.
But I also thought about how awesome it would be to have a little girl. I could teach her how to be rough and tough, yet still look good in a dress. And watch my husband get wrapped around her finger while he builds her a dollhouse and teaches her how to drive.
In the end, I chose not to find out the sex during my pregnancy. Because it didn't matter what came out, I was going to love it no matter what. Plus there isn't exactly a very good return policy on it if you don't get exactly what you wanted. And I can't even tell you how many times I heard people complain about how I wasn't finding out.
"What do you mean you're not finding out? Aren't you curious?" Well of course I am stupid, but that's what makes it fun! Because there's a really good chance you're getting one or the other! So what does it matter?
"Well how will I know what to buy you for a shower gift if I don't know what it is?" Hey dumbass, I'm registered for a reason. Pick anything off the list and send it to me! That's what I want and need, so that's what you should get me.
"But you'll have all this green and yellow stuff!" Yeah, so? So did I when I was a baby because "back then" you COULDN'T find out. And I turned out just fine! In fact, I'm wearing a pink shirt today, so I obviously figured out what color was assigned to me because I'm a girl. Plus, there's a good chance I'm going to have more than one kid. And if I have a boy next, I won't have to go out and buy all new stuff right away, because it's already gender neutrual!
"But I want to know!" Well guess what? You're not getting fat, puking your brains out, or getting stretch marks right now. So you don't get to make the decision, I do! So there!!!!
Ultimately, I'm thrilled I never knew. When she finally came out and the doctor said 'IT'S A GIRL!' I didn't care, I was just so happy she was here and healthy. She's now 5 months old and I couldn't imagine not having her in my life just the way she is. She's perfect.
Until later
~Betty
Monday, August 1, 2011
Betty the Ferberizer
So my daughter hates to sleep. It's literally torture for her (and for me) to put her to sleep. She hates to take naps too. We're talking 20 minutes here, 20 minutes there. If not sleeping was a competition on Survivor she'd out wit, out last, and out play everyone, even Richard Hatch!
I read an article awhile back about people who are considered "short sleepers." They basically just don't sleep and they're genetically wired to not sleep. And the gene mutation can be realized at a young age... say in the toddler years. (We've got about 12 months before we hit that range, but still...)
I also read an article today from one of my baby sites I follow that said babies in the range of 3-6 months should get at least 12-15 hours of sleep a day. Uh yeah, about that... we're not even close! In fact, we resist sleep so much (and I say we because when she's not sleeping, guess who else isn't sleeping? Yup, that's right, me.) that I have plenty of time for reading. News articles, not books. I don't have that much time. Plus she tries to rip the pages out and eat them because they're crinkly.
So basically what we have here is a classic case of I've already voided the warranty of my kid. Awesome, no returning her now. She's spoiled goods. Great! Now I just have to figure out how to make the best of a sleepless situation.
And that's called sleep training. (Again, the news articles) Apparently there are plenty of different ways to sleep train your baby and they come with varying levels of difficulty. Kind of like video games and trying to train a dragon. The most common way, and the one my husband is a fan of, is the cry it out method. It's actually not called that, but that's how it's referred as by Ferber, the baby sleep expert apparently. (I should note that Stoofy is still across the country right now, so I'm all on my own with this sleep thing while he sleeps in on weekends.)
So I'm supposed to just get her on a bed time routine. Check
Lay her in her bed as she's sleepy but not completely asleep. Check
Let her try to fall asleep on her own. Check
Don't worry if she cries. Kinda check
Let her keep crying for 5 minutes. Check
Come back in the room and soothe her but don't pick her up. Check
Go back out of the room to let her cry some more. Sad check
Back in for another round of soothing. Check
Back out for crying. Teary check
How long is this supposed to last? Check
When can I finally pick her up? Check
I picked her up but she's still screaming! Check
Is she supposed to cry for an hour straight? Check
This is bullshit and I'm soothing her now! Check
Ferber, you're a fucktard and I'm now sobbing, she's been crying for more than an hour and it's taking her another 20 minutes to just calm down and relax enough to try and soothe her to finally doze off.
And if you think all that crying made her sleep through the night, you'd be dead wrong. She woke up again like clockwork at 11, 1, and 5. She doesn't get fed for all of those wake ups, and she doesn't get held every time either because honestly I need to give my arms a break. But, she wakes up and starts screaming and crying every time.
So not only do I have a gene mutated baby who's a short sleeper, but I also have a baby who is only 5 months and has night terrors. Awesome, this is going to be awesome! I hope I can mutate into a short sleeper too!
Until later
~Betty
I read an article awhile back about people who are considered "short sleepers." They basically just don't sleep and they're genetically wired to not sleep. And the gene mutation can be realized at a young age... say in the toddler years. (We've got about 12 months before we hit that range, but still...)
I also read an article today from one of my baby sites I follow that said babies in the range of 3-6 months should get at least 12-15 hours of sleep a day. Uh yeah, about that... we're not even close! In fact, we resist sleep so much (and I say we because when she's not sleeping, guess who else isn't sleeping? Yup, that's right, me.) that I have plenty of time for reading. News articles, not books. I don't have that much time. Plus she tries to rip the pages out and eat them because they're crinkly.
So basically what we have here is a classic case of I've already voided the warranty of my kid. Awesome, no returning her now. She's spoiled goods. Great! Now I just have to figure out how to make the best of a sleepless situation.
And that's called sleep training. (Again, the news articles) Apparently there are plenty of different ways to sleep train your baby and they come with varying levels of difficulty. Kind of like video games and trying to train a dragon. The most common way, and the one my husband is a fan of, is the cry it out method. It's actually not called that, but that's how it's referred as by Ferber, the baby sleep expert apparently. (I should note that Stoofy is still across the country right now, so I'm all on my own with this sleep thing while he sleeps in on weekends.)
So I'm supposed to just get her on a bed time routine. Check
Lay her in her bed as she's sleepy but not completely asleep. Check
Let her try to fall asleep on her own. Check
Don't worry if she cries. Kinda check
Let her keep crying for 5 minutes. Check
Come back in the room and soothe her but don't pick her up. Check
Go back out of the room to let her cry some more. Sad check
Back in for another round of soothing. Check
Back out for crying. Teary check
How long is this supposed to last? Check
When can I finally pick her up? Check
I picked her up but she's still screaming! Check
Is she supposed to cry for an hour straight? Check
This is bullshit and I'm soothing her now! Check
Ferber, you're a fucktard and I'm now sobbing, she's been crying for more than an hour and it's taking her another 20 minutes to just calm down and relax enough to try and soothe her to finally doze off.
And if you think all that crying made her sleep through the night, you'd be dead wrong. She woke up again like clockwork at 11, 1, and 5. She doesn't get fed for all of those wake ups, and she doesn't get held every time either because honestly I need to give my arms a break. But, she wakes up and starts screaming and crying every time.
So not only do I have a gene mutated baby who's a short sleeper, but I also have a baby who is only 5 months and has night terrors. Awesome, this is going to be awesome! I hope I can mutate into a short sleeper too!
Until later
~Betty
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)