Yes, I'm back! But before I get into all the nitty-gritty of being AWOL for a few months, let's talk first about my latest confession.
I've developed a major problem. It's like a bad habit crossed with hoarding with a whole lot of laziness mixed in. I hear the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. So here's my admission: I have stopped folding and putting away my laundry. Instead, I just go out and buy more stuff.
Yup. That's it. I actually would rather spend more money than actually do the grown-up thing.
It's actually gotten really bad lately (as seen in the picture below).
Here's the conversation I had with Abby last night about Mount St. Laundry:
B: OMG. I have a serious problem.
A: With what???
B: I've decided I'm so sick of folding and doing laundry, I've resorted to just buying more shit and letting the other stuff pile up.
A: Oh yeah. Same boat.
B: The pile is actually really embarrassing. It's actually taller than me!
B: Add in all of Elly's clothes and it's a very expensive problem to have!
A: I have to just not shop at Target anymore. Those bastards know how to make me impulse buy. It's sneaky and mean.
B: Tell me about it! I have half their women's summer wardrobe.
A: I think it's partly because we've been cooped up in uniforms so long.
B: I actually really need to show you the pile. I'm half disgusted by my laziness and half chest-thumping proud of it!!!!
A: I blame that. Not recklessness or irresponsibility.
B: Yeah, I blame the uniform too.
A: Haha, I need a picture.
B: Or at least that'll be my rationalization for awhile!
B: Or at least that'll be my rationalization for awhile!
I send the picture.
B: Mountain O'Laundry.
B: It's all clean, but nothing is really folded and I can't find matching socks to save my life.
B: Notice the Dyson for scale reference.
(Waiting for a response.......)
A: That is respectable. I mean.... really. That's impressive.
B: I wish you could see/hear how hard I'm laughing now that I've confessed! But not even revealing my secret is going to guilt me into folding that shit this week.
B: This is how hoarding begins, I'm pretty sure.
A: As your friend, I vow to never be appalled by your habits. I will be amalled- amazed/appalled.
A: Because really, I'm just as bad... with fewer excuses.
First, let me say, that Abby is a great friend. And I appreciate that she won't judge my laziness.
Second, there is now a system to the pile. I know, in general terms, where some things are. I know where I can, generally speaking, find the towels, or Elly's pj's. I can't quite find matching socks quickly yet. But it is a system. And doesn't every system have its flaws? So I'm not quite sure that I have an issue with the Mount St. Laundry yet.
I really just need someone to come and fold it for me. Or at least hold me accountable. Or at the very least come and entertain me while I do the folding. Or better yet, I need to have company over so I'm at least motivated to hide it somewhere other than on the freakin' love seat in the den. I need someone to tell me it's un-American to live like that and the terrorists are going to win if I don't fold my laundry. Actually, I don't believe that since it's actually totally American to be a slob. I mean, cable networks make millions off of people who hoard and whose homes are a hot mess. So I guess that scare tactic isn't going to work for me.
So you're wondering at this point what the hell I have been doing the last few months if I haven't been blogging and clearly I can't blame it on the laundry. Stay tuned... I promise to come back with more on my life soon!
Update as of 2 hours after publishing this blog: It turns out that Mt. St. Laundry also provides entertainment for my child. Stoofy sent me a text with the following:
S: Elly ran around down stairs saying, "mamamamamamamamama." Then stops at the clothes, grabs your underwear and puts it on her head. Really kid?!?!?!
See, it's like the Boyne Mountain of my living room! (That's a Michigan skiing reference for those of you not in the know.)
If you like checking out new blogs, then head on over to Yeah Write. Stroll around and enjoy!
I was witness to the awesomeness that is Mount St. Laundry last night, and it is quite the sight to behold. Sort of like Mt. Rushmore, it's really a lot bigger in person.
ReplyDeleteBetty, thank you for also taking the time to show me your killer Chuck Norris laundry-fishing technique for retrieving clothes from the unseen depths of the pile.
~Abby
That's impressive. I am lucky enough to have my laundry in the basement...the pile is just as high (only it's all dirty)but it's out of sight and super duper out of mind. I've been known to leave clothes in the dryer for days on end and just keep fluffing them to avoid folding.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work!
This is simply amazing! And you're a brave woman to out yourself. But this might require an intervention... ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to report that Abby came over to help me fold the laundry. A true friend helps you do the crap you have no desire to do. :-)
DeleteI think it's really cool how said Mountain reflects the shape and stone of the fireplace -- etc. in colored cotton. Too funny. Without a laundry room myself our piles up on the dining room table. It was cleaned off on Sunday and today it's piled high again. My chore for tonight. Ha.
ReplyDeleteI could barely focus on the words as I was salivating over the cookie picture. That's truly mean of you! That mountain of laundry is awesome. And it reminded me that I have a lot of laundry that needs folding tonight!
ReplyDeleteKristin, sometimes I have cookie give-aways on my facebook page. After this comment, I feel like it might be time for another batch give-away ;-)
DeleteMy laundry room looks like this quite often. I really, really, really hate folding laundry. It was my chore at home for as long as I can remember, AND I worked retail for nearly 6 years doing the same thing -- folding, straightening, picking up, cleaning, etc. I'd much prefer to just leave it in a mountain pile as well.
ReplyDeleteFolding laundry and cleaning the toilet- I'm embarrassed to say all that I would give for someone else to do them for me. I've actually had to iron onesies just so the baby could wear them after they sat in a mountain of laundry...
ReplyDeleteDo you leave clothes wet and rotting in the washer for a week 'cause you have your head too far up your own ass to remember to dry them? That's so me:( FUNNY post!
ReplyDeleteI DO do that some times. I just wash them again and pray I remember to put them in the dryer. I also dry clothes many, many times. I'm in the process of hanging a clothes line in my back yard so I can maybe cut down on my energy bill. It's getting a little out of hand!
DeleteKeeping it real! That's a lot of laundry...
ReplyDeleteHahah I have had two coworkers tell me they do that - buy new clothes instead of laundry.
ReplyDeleteI actually have no problem doing and folding the laundry. But then it usually sits downstairs in the basement until the next week when we need to do more laundry. Then I put away last week's laundry (that we've been picking from all week for clothes to wear & towels to dry ourselves with) and start the cycle again.
ReplyDelete