All-mom pickers

Saturday, I had a mega sale of all of Elly’s old clothes and baby junk.  I started working on sorting all of her stuff about 2 months ago.  (Did I mention I'm a hoarder?)  Needless to say, there was a ton of crap and really had to be sorted out to the various categories of sizes, gear and sleepwear.

Finally, I picked a day and was committed to selling the stuff and making back some of my money.  The only problem is that I happened to pick the hottest f’ing day of the year in Washington D.C. to have a yard sale. 

It was so hot…

How hot was it?

It was so hot a plane sank into the tarmac at Reagan National Airport.  Now if that isn’t freakin’ hot, I don’t know what is!

I had been advertising this sale for three days leading up to the sale.  By Friday when I realized the weatherman was going to be right and I would actually sweat my balls off spending the afternoon outside in the sun, I made the executive decision to move the sale inside.

BRILLIANT!

I had such a great response.  Tons of people.  And by tons of people, I actually grew a bit concerned at one point that I may have exceeded the maximum capacity for fire safety exits in my house! 

But the payoff was great!

Tons of pregnant women made it out searching for great deals and cool A/C.  But with these women came the hagglers.  Now, I understand that haggling in other cultures is very common and actually the norm.  For me, I’m not that used to it.

Thank God my hours invested into reality television paid off again.

Friday night I stayed up late folding clothes, watching the History Channel’s American Pickers.  I established a great cost system that the more you bought the better a deal you got.  Thanks to Frank, that’s the power of bundling. 

I found myself negotiating like Mike:

B: “That’ll be $14.”

Random woman: “$10.”

B: “I’m at $14, you’re at $10, let’s split the difference and it’s $12.”

Random guy: “How much is that?”

B: “$25”

Random guy: “$5?”

B” “Uh, NO! I could do $20.”

Random guy walks away.  Jerk!  Who tries to offer $5 for an exersaucer in great condition?  This is All-mom pickers not Let’s Make a Deal. 

Overall it was a great turn out and yielded great results.  Too bad within 24 hours I turned around and became a mom picker myself and went shopping for Elly’s fall/winter fashion line.  It’s funny how I can make so much money one day and be back to nothing the next all because of my kid. 

Christmas Shopping

Now that it's November, it's time to get down to serious business... Christmas shopping.  Don't get me wrong, I will be celebrating November in all its glory all month long and I do NOT do anything Christmasy until at LEAST the day after Thanksgiving.

I'm very particular about this for a few reasons.  The most important is that my birthday is at the end of November and I have no intention of getting into the Christmas spirit until AFTER the best day of the year.  This year it rocks even more because while you're all eating your Thanksgiving dinner, I'll be eating my BIRTHDAY FEAST!  (In case you can't figure out the most obvious hints here, my birthday falls on Thanksgiving day this year. I can message you my address for birthday cards if you'd like! :-D ) 

But the one Christmas thing I do take advantage of during the last month of fall (my favorite season, which is another reason I try to prolong my love of November) is the Christmas shopping deals.  I have no choice because the damn retailers force you to think about Christmas starting in August.  (I wish that was a lie, but I saw Christmas lights at home depot in August.  I'm just sayin'... fucking corporate America!) 

This year is even more exciting because we have Elly to shop for.  This means more toys!  I say more toys because last year Stoofy and I got each other legos.  What can I say, we're big kids. 

We already got her the first of a couple gifts.  I have no intention of going overboard since she'll barely be 10 months old at Christmas.  What does she even know about getting gifts yet?  Plus, I need to take advantage of the few years I have before she can talk and then demand what she wants from Santa.  Plus I buy something for her nearly every time I leave the house.  To her, every day is Christmas. 

But to be honest, I was SO EXCITIED when the Toys R Us Christmas catalog arrived at our front doorstep!!!  I flipped through all of those pages making a mental list of all the things I wanted.  I mean I wanted to get Elly, you know, so I could play with her. 

There were oodles of baby toys, but I didn't stop there.  I couldn't help but love the Kitchen Aide all-in-one kitchen and matching refrigerator and washer/dryer set, the craftsman work bench complete with toy chain saw and tool belt, and the ultimate Barbie dream house and really everything Barbie.  (It blows my mind that the family camper is $75 by the way.) Plus thousands and thousands of Lego pieces all waiting for me to assemble into the most elaborate of creations.

I just kept making a mental note of all the things I wanted... for Elly of course.  And that's when I realized how happy I was to have a little girl.  Because she can have the tea set and the tool belt and we can play together!  (That and I can pass off all the toys I want to play with as toys for her.)

Like I said, I was super excited about the mega toy catalog.  Elly was excited too.... she had a blast ripping the paper to shreds and eating it.  Let's hope one day she enjoys picking out toys as much as I do, but not too soon.  My budget might not be able to handle that!

Shake What Your Mamma Gave Ya

Before becoming a mom, I used to buy the loudest and most obnoxious toys I could find as gifts for all the kids I knew.  I did it knowing the parents would hate me.  I'm evil like that, because honestly, as a young single girl, what did I care?  I now realize just how awful of a human being I was for doing that. (I should probably make a trip to confession for it very soon.)

Because it seems as though every toy manufactured nowadays is loud. Very loud.  (Makes me wonder if this is China's master plan: drive parents insane and pounce when we're at our weakest.)  Every toy literally has a bell or whistle on it.  They all require batteries.  Half of them come with an option on which language your child learns. 

And yet, I keep acquiring the loudest toys ever.  By my own choice.  (Read: I'm a masochist.)

I just got Elly a new toy.  It's one of those Leap Frog activity tables and it's got a million buttons and makes millions of noises.  What can I say?  I'm a hoarder.  And it's a good thing, because she LOVES it! 

It's possibly her new favorite toy!  She's so entertained by all the flashing lights and songs.  She stands, clinging to the table, and bounces along to the songs.  (I also do my part in singing along with it.)  And as she keeps dancing, I can't help but think... dear God, I hope this isn't a sign of the future: table dancing!

Because as she's standing there in only her diaper (because I don't feel like wrestling her into her onsie right this second), shaking and dancing all over the place, I can't help but worry.  I mean, maybe I've been watching Dena do the Jersey Turnpike one too many times in Italy.  Or maybe it's the flashbacks I'm having of dancing at Clutch Cargos (Pontiac!!!  What up!) that worries me.  Either way, her dancing scares me.

As I watch my daughter grow, I can't help but to be amazed at how similar she is to me.  How her funny little personality is a lot like mine already.  And then it hits me, I'm raising me and that's just scary! 

But on the other hand, she's only 8 months old.  What does she know about the bootypop? Until then Elly, just keep shakin' what your mama gave ya!

Hoarding

As my status update stated earlier today: My name is Betty and I am a baby toy hoarder.  No joke.  I cruise all sorts of sights looking for deals on more toys for Elly.  When I get her something new, I get excited as if it's for me! 

For her at this age, I don't mind buying lots of her toys second hand.  Since babies don't have too much of a tendency to destroy their own toys, they're all in good shape and just need new batteries.  So for the best deals, I cruise a ton of different sales pages. 

The best are the military base sales pages.  There are a TON of moms on these pages and they all have kids.  Tons of women with tons of kids = TONS OF TOYS! 

I get so excited when I see new toys posted on these pages.  But it's one of the fastest moving pages I've ever seen.  If you want something, you'd better hurry up and call dibs as fast as you can, or you will be left in the dust by someone else.

It's like the ultimate instant rush when you're the first person to claim an item because you've beat out 500+ other women.  And it feels like half of them are all out vying for the same things you are. 

It's the virtual equivalent to black Friday shopping for the one 'it' toy of the season.  You scout out all the locations, check all the ads, and plan your attack.  You get in line hours before everything opens and end up running as fast as you can through the aisles to get to the toy section because if you don’t get little Elly that activity table you’ve been wanting to get her, your world might come to an end.  So you end up elbowing the other women at the shelves until you rip someone's hair out as you grab the toy out of their hands and run to the register to check out as fast as you can. 

Yup, this sales page is kind of like that.  But it’s all online, so it’s not as dangerous. There’s no actual elbowing (but there is name calling… it’s usually only heard by my computer screen.)  No one's hair is within my grasp. (Probably best since I tend to get overly excited when I want something.  Funny how my daughter does the same thing now.)

But now is the BEST time to start cruising the page for toys.  Because all these women are cleaning out their kids' toy boxes and making room (and extra cash) for the upcoming Christmas toy season. 

It's like hitting the toy box motherload!  And what's better is I don't feel terribly guilty for buying so many things.  Because like I said, they're used, but in great shape.

Like today for example... I scored an activity table for Elly.  Usually those things run around $35+ brand new.  I got mine for $8.  All I had to do was dust it off with a few clorox wipes.  And badabing badaboom, we’ve got ourselves 30 minutes of colors/alphabet fun time!

Tomorrow I'm picking up a basket full of toys that if they were brand new (all Leap Frog stuff) would cost somewhere near $200.  I'll be buying them for $20.  And since I buy batteries and clorox wipes in bulk, they'll be practically brand new in no time. 

So why shouldn't I hoard?  What's the point of stopping when I can make room for them all (albeit in random locations and my socks are slowly losing ground in the closet) and they're dirt cheap?  Why shouldn't I give my kid everything, but at a fraction of the cost? 

Probably because I'm supposed to be shopping for business clothes for me instead.  I need to learn to be a clothing hoarder for myself again and probably stop buying stuff for her soon.... but then what kind of mother would I be?