Elly do it

Last night wasn't a great night for me and Elly.  I picked her up from daycare, give her a hug and a kiss and she proceeds to pick up her jacket.  I go to help her put it on and she says yells "ELLY DO IT!!!!" 

Zipping her own coat

Ok fine.  So I let her put on her coat. But I was in a hurry and she was taking forever since, you know, she's two and hasn't quite master figuring out which hole to put her arm through.  So I try to help a tiny, little bit and get her going in the right direction. 

"ELLY DO IT!!!!!!!!!"

Ok. FINE!

Finally we're dressed and ready to leave. But before we can walk out the door, she has to press the button to open the door.  She has to walk out to the car on her own.  She has to climb into the car on her own and she has to get into her car seat on her own.  Because after all...

"ELLY DO IT!!!!"

We get home and she's trying to help open the door.  It's really more of a pain in my ass for her to do this, but she's screaming again.

"ELLY DO IT!!"

Time to make dinner, "ELLY DO IT!!!" (It took 15 minutes to convince her that she needed to play in her sensory bucket and not try and help me cook the taco meat.)

Time to clean up the house, "ELLY DO IT!!!" (This took an additional 25 minutes to clean up after her, but not let her know I was doing it, since “Elly do it.”)

Walk up the stairs to bath time, get the bubbles in the bath, take off clothes and try on the potty, climb into the tub...

"ELLY DO IT!!!!!"

Except she can't do it all yet.  The kid takes for FOR.FUCKING.EVER. to get things done.  Probably because she really has no actual life experience doing half these things yet.  I mean, she's only two, but she thinks she can do it all and won't accept any help. 

So here we are, in a conundrum. I'm the experienced 30-year-old know-it-all mother.  She's the stubborn and independently-minded child who won't accept help. I want things done quickly and efficiently.  I have limited time to get everything done and don't have 15 minutes while she figures out pulling her arm out of her sleeve and sticking it through the head-hole of her shirt will not equal a successful attempt at undressing herself.

Yet, here she is, all needing to do everything on her own. And I know she has to learn all of these important life skills.  I have to encourage her to learn or else I'm going to be stuck still wiping her ass when she's 30 because she still won't have figured that out. (She'll probably blame me because I never cut her hair.)

I have to take a moment and realize that her stubbornness and desire to do things on her own, learn new skills and take charge are all qualities I love about her and that I've given her. (The apple doesn’t exactly fall far from the tree.) It's this desire to learn and take on new challenges that will make her successful in life. 

I should be grateful that she is excited to help me put the soap in the dishwasher and start it.  I should be thrilled she wants to help me put the clothes in and out of the dryer. I should be happy she wants to venture on her own and learn how things work. After all, this means in a few more years I'll be able to put her to work around the house, right?

After a deep breath, a mental regroup and a few bedtime stories, I asked her to help turn out the lights for the night. I picked her up so she could reach the light switch and said, "Elly do it."

She looked at me with big eyes and said, "Momma do it." 

You're killing me kid.